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A New Orleans lawyer sought an FHA loan for a client. He was told the loan
would be granted if he could prove satisfactory title to a parcel of property
being offered as collateral. The title to the property dated back to 1803, which
took the lawyer three months to track down.
After sending the information to the FHA, he received the following reply
(actual letter):
"Upon review of your letter adjoining your client's loan application, we note
that the request is supported by an Abstract of Title. While we compliment the
able manner in which you have prepared and presented the application, we must
point out that you have only cleared title to the proposed collateral back to
1803. Before final approval can be accorded, it will be necessary to clear the
title back to its origin."
Annoyed, the lawyer responded as follows (actual letter):
"Your letter regarding title in Case No. 189156 has been received. I note that
you wish to have title extended further than the 194 years covered by the
present application. I was unaware that any educated person in this country,
particularly those working in the property area, would not know that Louisiana
was purchased by the U. S. from France in 1803, the year of origin identified in
our application. For the edification of uninformed FHA bureaucrats, the title to
the land prior to U. S. ownership was obtained from France, which had acquired
it by Right of Conquest from Spain. The land came into possession of Spain by
Right of Discovery made in the year 1492 by a sea captain named Christopher
Columbus, who had been granted the privilege of seeking a new route to India by
the then reigning monarch, Isabella. The good queen, being a pious woman and
careful about titles, almost as much as the FHA, took the precaution of securing
the blessing of the Pope before she sold her jewels to fund Columbus'
expedition. Now the Pope, as I'm sure you know, is the emissary of Jesus Christ,
the Son of God. And God, it is commonly accepted, created this world. Therefore,
I believe it is safe to presume that He also made that part of the world called
Louisiana. He, therefore, would be the owner of origin. I hope ... you find His
original claim to be satisfactory.
Now, may we have our ... loan?"
They got it.

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